Smile

Oct 1

I recently had the privilege of leading a retreat for the Daughters of St. Francis de Sales at the Visitation Monastery in Mobile, Alabama.

The St. Francis de Sales Association, also known as the Daughters of St. Francis de Sales, was founded in France in 1872. This is a spiritual family made up of lay Catholic women, single, married, or widowed, who seek to live their lives grounded in the Gospel, according to Salesian teachings and virtues.

During the retreat, one of the Daughters described their habit in a way that immediately caught my attention. She said, “Our habit is our smile.”

Habits are usually often associated with clothing or religious dress. You will often see an Oblate wearing a clerical shirt and Profession Cross. That’s our local habit. The Visitation Sisters, too, have their distinctive religious habit. But the Daughters of St. Francis de Sales have chosen something simple and deeply Salesian: a smile.

At first, I was struck by their habit because a smile can sometimes be misleading. A quick internet search will show plenty of articles linking smiling with hiding emotions, masking discomfort, or deceiving others. But that is not what these women meant.

In Salesian Spirituality, every genuine exterior action flows from the interior life of the heart. For the Daughters, their “habit,” their smile, arises from hearts shaped by God’s presence in the moment. Those hearts have known both joy and sorrow, comfort and pain, sickness and health. Yet they continue to choose joy. They continue to smile.

St. Francis de Sales once wrote to St. Jane de Chantal, “Provided that love of God be your desire, live always joyful and courageous.” (Letter, January 20, 1607).

Salesian joy is not shallow optimism. It does not ignore suffering or pretend that everything is easy. Rather, it springs from courage. The Daughters’ smile is a living sign of that courage. A smile that is not forced, faked, or rushed. It comes from a great deal of heart work and reveals a joy that is not toppled by sorrow or even death, a joy rooted in the Gospel.

May God be Praised!